Vagueness, you are a bitch. I would like to stuff my foot down your throat til your shit’s in my shoes and you have to pay my dry cleaning bill. (thanks bad-ass, hood-rat, gangsta Natalie Portman, for the line, not vagueness, Natalie is too cool for vagueness). I am tired of your ‘Woe as me…ho hum…hey, look at this fancy, schmancy, new raincoat’ tricks. Stop opening the door to your life a teensy weensy crack before slamming it shut in my face and distracting me with your shiny and new stuff. You either have something to say or you don’t, I’m not gonna pull it out of you, not even when I remove my shoe from your digestive tract. So, getting to spilling the beans or shut the fuck up already.
In other news, it was markedly warmer last night; I was able to shed a layer or two. I did learn the answer to the age old question: Why do you make the bed if you are just going to mess it back up in a few hours. Apparently, if you use more than 1 sheet or a light blanket when you sleep, you somehow twist those suckers into locker room quality snapping tools and if you don’t straighten them before going back to bed, you will spend the your entire fucking night trying (unsuccessfully I might add) to untangle them.
In further, other news, I freaking love the Aloe Vera socks. I wonder if they make Aloe Vera footie pajamas. If not, can I buy enough of the socks and find someone that loves me (or will accept my complete love and adoration (for as long as the pjs last) as payment because I am pretty sure investing in enough socks to stitch into a pair of footie pajamas is gonna be all the money I got.
In still further, other news, why are pajamas called a pair? Why are jeans called a pair?
In further still, further, other news, I went to the gym today and had a pretty decent run. I was pretty tired and about to stop when Down came on the radio and I was so pumped about it I managed to keep running through the song!
In other, further still, further, other news, I bought a new sports bra and tested it out today. It did a good job keeping everything in place but getting it on was special treat. The bra has a zipper closure in the front and when I bought it I thought that seemed like a good idea – sorta a quick release mechanism once I’m all sweaty from working out. Turns out, holding the two sides together over the boobage while trying to zip the damn thing is nearly impossible. The purpose of a sports bra is to hold everything down so no one, namely me, gets maimed during the working out, but in order to do that, the bra needs to be pretty tight. Pretty tight + a zipper = almost asking the lady next to me to push my boobs down while I zip the zipper.
